On one warm November day I was on a flight from Entebbe in Uganda en route to London Heathrow. A couple of hours after takeoff, I was listening to some classical music and it just occurred to me to look through the window and lo and behold, we were flying over the Sahara desert.
The Sahara Desert is the largest desert in the world and occupies approximately 10% of the African continent. From the Atlantic Ocean in the West, the greater Sahara stretches across Africa to the Red sea and down to the highlands of Ethiopia encompassing 9,100,000 square kilometers.
The Sahara is one of the hottest regions in the world with mean annual temperatures exceeding 30 degrees centigrade. In the hottest months temperatures can rise over 50 degrees centigrade and temperatures can fall below freezing in winter. The Sahara is extremely windy. Hot dust filled winds create dust devils which can make the temperatures even hotter.
So, here I am, beholding this 'fierce' and challenging place from about 36,000 feet and it looked beautiful, calm and seemingly very hot.
Then, something happened; as I was about to change the song I was listening to from the list of songs on the small TV screen in front of me, my eyes fell on the temperature readings and the air temperature outside the plane was in negatives. I blinked, wiped my face and looked again, oh yes, it was in negatives!
Hang on, I said to myself, aren't we over the Sahara? I asked myself, yes we are came the answer immediately, so why the freezing temperatures outside?
In my curiosity, I was just about to seek clarification from my next seat neighbour when like light bulbs being switched on in my head, I recalled my early years in school when I learnt in my Geography class that: The Higher you go, the cooler it becomes!
Ahhhh! I said, hmmm.., now I get it! How true. Of course, I was 36,000 feet above sea level, that was quite a high altitude. I also realised that; from a higher altitude everything looks really beautiful - even the Sahara!
Ladies & gentle men, you have had it figuratively said time and time again that attitude determines altitude. In fact Zig Ziglar once said; "It's your attitude and not your aptitude that determines your altitude". That is spot on. You see, your attitude ultimately determines what angle or view of life you will have, it could be a high one or a low one, it all depends on your attitude to life and life can more often be like the Sahara desert, tough, fierce, challenging, hotter; but boy! on a high altitude of your mind, you will view life differently and I will show you how.
In this post today, I am going to explore how our attitudes can determine our mental altitudes especially in the context of our relationships, come to think of it, your attitude goes a long way in determining what company of people you will keep, what actions you will take, how successful you will be and above all, how much and how deep you will enjoy life. Something worth exploring, wouldn't you agree?
Right then...
You will also agree with me that, the truth, about us humans is; we are all not at the same level of development emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and physically.
In dealing with people therefore, we ought to recognise this fact if our relationships have to thrive and be meaningful, we have to deal with each person according to his/her level of development and our attitudes are a key factor in ensuring success in this area of our lives.
The fact is that relationships are everything. Your relationships form a core part of your Identity. They have an inordinate impact on who you are, what you do and everything you become. It's true that most of us determine our place and position in life in relationship to the people around us. Relationship building is the most important factor determining your success virtually in any calling or business and believe me, your attitude is a very fundamental ingredient to building lasting and fulfilling relationships.
The Concise Oxford English Dictionary defines attitude as: a settled way of thinking or feeling.
So, what exactly are some of the attitudes we ought to possess to enable us build and sustain successful relationships? well, that is the burden of this article and I trust that in the few lines and paragraphs that follow, we will get understanding, insight and direction.
Here is the heart of the matter,..... it's all about enhancing the quality of your relationships and building strong, lasting emotional connections with the people you care about and as Arthur Conan Doyle said; 'Skill is fine and genius is splendid, but the right contacts(Relationships) are more valuable than either' and in the same light Brian Tracy also said; ' Virtually all of your problems in life will come as a result of you entering the wrong relationships with the wrong people and virtually all of your successes in life will be accompanied by great relationships with good people who help you and who you help in return'.
Ok, let's look at some of these attitudes, shall we;
1. ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE.
Giving thanks at all occasions in everything is one of the foremost virtues of victorious and visionary people. One simply sees good in everything and hence has reason to say thank you at all times regardless of what has befallen him/her. In the same token, see the best in others, be grateful for their friendship and companionship, let them know how much they mean to you, compliment them on their traits, possessions, breakthroughs and achievements; give your compliments Immediately, and graciously. Whenever somebody does something for you, be expedient in returning thanks - do not take whatever is done for you for granted, however small the act.
The point is this..
When you exude an attitude of gratitude at all times, you make people around you feel important. The truth is,... everything you say or do that causes another person to feel better in any way also causes you to feel better to the same degree.
This clearly resonates well with what wise King Solomon said in his proverbs: " ....and he that watereth shall be watered also himself" Proverbs 11:25b
Haven't you realised that when you encourage, inspire, motivate someone else, you feel motivated, inspired and encouraged yourself? And guess what...
The converse is true, when you degrade, insult and abhor someone else, you feel the same too!
The need for appreciation is a deep subconscious desire of every individual you meet. When you satisfy this need, you will by all accounts become one of the most popular person in that persons world, and what is the key to expressing gratitude and appreciation? Simple, just say 'thank you' on every occasion.
You say thanks in a whole host of different ways: by giving compliments, admiration, giving encouragement, by unconditionally accepting people for who they are, by smiling, giving a hug, a pat on the back....., all these actions communicate one message ;-well done 'buddy' I am really proud of you'.
In fact, the best way to ensure your happiness is to assist others experience their own.
"Those who bring Sunshine to others can not keep it from themselves" James Banie
2. FORGIVENESS
"...forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors" Matthew 6:12. On any given day, you will find it inevitable not to have hurt others either through your actions and words, intentionally or not intentionally. It's one of those inevitable things that happen because of our imperfect natures and way(s) of thinking. You will also be hurt by others and the irony of this is that, your deepest hurts will come from those closest to you most. It is therefore very important that we deliberately chose to forgive rather than hold grudges with any one at any one time.
Jim Loehr & Tony Schwartz in their book; In the power of Full engagement, said " The richer and deeper the source of our emotional recovery, the more we refill our reserves and the more resilient we become" You see, .. people are 100% emotional. People decide emotionally then justify logically. Emotion comes first. So when we are hurt, our emotions immediately take over and for some, this leads to prolonged periods of sulking and being grumpy and they will justify it logically by saying that they are hurt. What they seem not to understand is that a lot of their emotional energy which could otherwise be expended in some other productive venture is being put to waste and destructive tendencies, so the faster they recover from that hurt through total and sincere forgiveness, the better for them.
So if there is anyone who has hurt you even as you read this paragraph right now, it could be your parent(s), your spouse, your close pal, your sibling, your pastor, teacher, work mate,..., whoever it is, find it in your heart to forgive and release them, it's a very noble and eternal act and the rewards are worth it.
Forgiveness is a choice and we all have to make that choice time and again if our relationships are to be worth our time, effort and rewards thereof.
3. COURAGE
Courage is a very admirable quality. Your boldness will help you get as much as you need in life. The bold move makes you seem larger and more powerful than you are. More than that, he bold draw attention and what draws attention, draws power. We simply cannot keep our eyes off the audacious - we can't wait to see their next bold move.
Every one admires the bold; no one honours the timid, isn't that true?
Better still...
A courageous person is an upward and forward looking person, faces the future without fear but with determination, not with doubt but with faith. He/She is willing to take great chances and reach for new horizons and remake the world around them. They recognise that their is more to their life than the ordinary, they take the status quo and turn it around. They are simply magnetic and very inspiring to be around them. The good news is that you can be one of those very courageous ones as well.
The courageous individuals teach us to have our horizons limitless and ultimately if we are to be true to our past, we also have to seize the future each and every day and courage will help us make the most of our time, abilities (effort), make the most of our opportunities and ultimately make the most of our lives and relationships.
And...
No matter how bitter the raw, how stony the road, courage enables us to persevere, not to falter or grow weary but to demand, strive and shape a better destiny! we simply refuse to give up on the idea of forward and upward move but ultimate triumph, despite the most extreme odds.
What an admirable attitude to have! waw. It will truly make you attractive.
4. COMPASSION
Compassion draws you closer to the hearts and minds of others especially the destitute, suffering, poor and hence grants you access to the unity of spirit - by far a very irresistible force.
Compassion makes you believable, it magnetises and magnifies the power of your faith and undeniably makes you very welcoming and attractive in the sight and hearts of many. Compassion moves the heavens on your behalf and bestows upon you the invisible power of influence and force of accomplishment.
Compassion naturally leads you to be a giver, it enhances the quality of benevolence - one of the hallmark characteristics of the truly superior person.
When you give freely and generously of yourself to others or for a cause, you feel more valuable and happier inside.
Here is a principle to remember when it comes to benevolence and or compassion: "The more you give of yourself to others without expectation of return, the more good things there are that will come back to you from most unexpected sources"
You also realise that over time you are becoming more patient and understanding, less judgmental or demanding of others, you feel peaceful, confident and pleasant to be around. In a nutshell, you become a better and finner person.
5. INTEGRITY
Your Character is the most important thing that you develop in your entire life and your character is based on your integrity.
You develop integrity, and become a completely honest person, by practicing telling the truth to yourself and others in every situation.
It is imperative that your relationships are based on the foundation of truth and this can be done by developing the habit of living in truth with yourself and with everyone around you. Of course this does not mean that you will always be right 100% of the time, it however emphasises the fact that you endeavour to tell the truth, as you see or know it. Others will learn to know that they can confidently rely on you and your word. Though they may not like what you say on certain occasions, they will still know that you always speak the truth. This goes a very long way to earn you a great reputation and form a very solid foundation for your integrity.
Listen to what Shakespeare once wrote, "To thine own self be true, and then it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man".
In this day and age with the advancement of technology, CCTV and satellite, you cannot afford to be careless about how you conduct yourself, treat others or do business. To be successful nowadays is largely determined by the number of people who TRUST you and who are willing to; for example,... work for you if you are an employer, give you credit if you are a borrower, buy your products if you are an entrepreneur, help you during difficult times etc. Here TRUST is very essential, and trust is earned not given, and you earn trust by being a person of integrity.
You must guard your integrity as a sacred thing, as the most important statement about you.
As Brian Tracy once said; 'Whenever you are in doubt about a course of action, simply ask yourself, "Is this the right thing to do?" And then behave accordingly.
6. LOVE
As Apostle Paul said in 1Corinthians 13:2-3"And though I have the gift of prophesy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains,.....And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not Love, I am nothing" No doubt, one of the greatest statements and message to any generation.
You could actually possess all of the 5 attitudes listed above, but without Love, your relationships are doomed to fail.
Even our Lord Jesus Christ emphasised this point of love so much, that He gave a new commandment: "....THOU SHALT LOVE THE LORD THY GOD WITH ALL THY HEART, AND WITH ALL THY SOUL AND WITH ALL THY MIND........., THOU SHALT LOVE THY NEIGHBOUR AS THYSELF" Matthew 22:37-39
To love is a decision you make and should form a core part of your attitude(s) if your relationships are to have any meaning at all.
Lets take to heart what Jesus Christ said in in the scripture above and also embrace the golden Rule: "DO UNTO OTHERS WHAT YOU WOULD HAVE THEM DO UNTO YOU".
In closing, I would like to say that; the way to a supper attitude and hence great relationships at any time of the day and at any day of the week is to Trust in God with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.
When you do that, you will be seeing things from a higher plain/high mental altitude and at that altitude, all things look beautiful. There is no room for complacency, no room for criticism, condemnation or complaints; even the fierce dessert(s) of your life will look beautiful from that high mental altitude as a result of your great attitude(s).
Let wisdom enter into your heart and let knowledge be pleasant to your soul, consequently, discretion shall preserve your estate as a result of your change of state and understanding shall keep you and lead you to every good path.
Do also remember to embrace mercy and truth for thus you will find favour in the sight of God and Man.
Thank you for travelling this far with me today, you have certainly demonstrated a keen sense of diligence and may God bless you and your relationships.
I Love you and look forward to hosting you again next time right here. Be sure to look after one another and let's make our world a better place and also make our relationships to flourish by embracing the great attitudes we have learnt today. "Weakness of attitude becomes weakness of Character" - A.Einstein
Peace & Love
Libs
Saturday, 25 July 2009
Wednesday, 15 July 2009
Friday, 10 July 2009
Happiness is good medicine
With news about the recession, wars, gun & knife crime, world poverty, hunger, court cases, home repossessions, immigration matters, broken marriages etc; with all these things staring us almost at every turn and twist, there is undeniably among many, an aura of hopelessness, uncertainty, apathy, fear, resentment, selfishness and to make matters worse, Love seems to be flying off the windows and doors of many households, companies and organisations.
In the midst of all these social, ethical and personal quagmires', is it possible to really be HAPPY? what is HAPPINESS anyway?
Well...,
When it is all said and done, when everything is clean & dusted, at the end of the day, your HAPPINESS is your own, your troubles are your own, to be HAPPY or burdened - depends on you!....
Those words set the tone for what the rest of this post reveals.
Dr. John A. Schindler once defined happiness as "A state of the mind in which our thinking is pleasant most of the time".
Oh, how true...
Maxwell Maltz in His book; Psycho cybernetics, said "Happiness is native to the human mind and its physical machine. We think better, perform better, feel better, and are healthier when we are happy. Even our physical sense organs work better.
...Margaret Corbart has found that memory is greatly improved, and the mind is relaxed, when the subject is thinking pleasant thoughts. Psychosomatic medicine has proved that our stomachs, liver, heart, and all our internal organs function better when we are happy.
Thousands of years ago, wise king Solomon said in his Proverbs: 'A merry heart doeth good like medicine, but a broken spirit drieth up the bones'
....Havard psychologists studied the correlation between happiness and criminality and concluded that the old Dutch proverb, 'Happy people are never wicked,' was scientifically true. They found that a majority of criminals came from unhappy homes, had history of unhappy human relationships.
A ten year study of frustration at Yale University brought out that much of what we call immorality and hostility to others is brought about by our own unhappiness.
....A recent survey showed that by and large, optimistic cheerful business men who looked on the bright side of things were more successful than pessimistic businessmen.
....It appears that in our popular thinking about happiness we have managed to get the cart before the horse. 'Be kind and loving to other people and you will be happy.' ' I would be happy,' we say to ourselves, 'if I could be successful and healthy.'
It might be nearer the truth if we said, 'Be happy - and you will be good, more successful, healthier, feel and act more charitably towards others.' "
In reading this passage I not only see this as the best advice I can give myself, but everyone I come into contact with at church, cell group, work, socials.
So many people wonder why for example people like President Barack Obama are always so calm, cool and collected. Many wonder how he is able to speak before crowds in a non- chalant, totally relaxed way and still have everyone totally riveted.
I believe it is because he has no thoughts of resistance when he speaks. He is not concerned about offending anyone. He is not even trying to get people to like him, He is simply HIM, take it or leave it.
Very few people are this way. Most are trying to figure out how to get others to approve of them or like them. Not a good strategy because the more you NEED others to like you the less they will like you and you start developing feelings of unworthiness and self pity. Not good, not at all.
Same goes with money. The more you NEED it - the more it will stay away from you. Money and friends go where they are wanted - not where they are NEEDED. There is a world of difference between want and need. One attracts. The other repels.
Never NEED anything.
Want comes from a feeling of "I'm happy already and I'd like to have this, too." Need comes from a feeling of "I'm miserable and frustrated and I need this thing to make me HAPPY."
Most of us have been taught to set goals, to have a burning desire - be pumped up!, to be optimistic and have a positive attitude.
That is all good and should be encouraged, however, what do you do when you look at your bank statement, or your finances and you immediately begin to feel bad and agitated? What do you do when the perceived reality of your situation begins ruining your day? What do you do when you feel frustrated, fearful and worried? huh, what do you do?
Cure for Unhappiness
"We are never living, but only hoping to live; and looking forward always to being happy, it is inevitable that we never are so" said Pascal
"The attitude of unhappiness is not only painful, it is mean and ugly," says William James.
"What can be more base and unworthy than pinning, pulling, mumping mood, no matter by what outward ills it may have been engendered? what is more injurious to others? what less helpful as a way out of difficulty? It but perpetuates the trouble which occasioned it, and increases the total evil of the situation"
'Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be,' said Abraham Lincoln.
"Happiness is purely internal," says psychologist Dr. Matthew N. Chappel. "It is produced, not by objects, but by Ideas, thoughts and attitudes which can be developed by the individuals own activities, irrespective of the environment."
Stop letting things push you around! be reminded that happiness is not something that happens to you.It is something that you yourself do and determine upon.
If you wait for happiness to catch up with you or 'just happen' or to be brought to you by others or circumstances, well, you are likely to wait a long time my dear.
No one can determine or decide what you will think but yourself. If you wait for until circumstances 'justify' your thinking pleasant thoughts, you are also most likely to wait till eternity.
Everyday comes with a mixed package of good and evil. No day is at all 100% 'good'.
You will find that there are somethings and 'facts' present in the world and our personal lives at any one time, which will 'justify either a pessimistic and grumpy outlook, or an optimistic and happy outlook, it all depends on what we chose to focus on. Think, Decide & Act appropriately.
Its not a matter of being intellectually honest or dishonest. Good is as real as evil. What are you giving your primary attention to? what thoughts are you continuously holding in your mind? are you aware of them?
Remember, you are RESPONSIBLE for your own HAPPINESS , no one else is; not your government, not your company, not your wife, not your husband, not your pastor, not your children not even God! but YOURSELF!
Happiness is not something that is earned or deserved, if you are going to be happy at all, you must be happy - period! not happy "because of," Mmm hmm.., no, not that way. No "because of's."
If you're happy even though you don't yet have in your possession the thing you want - then you are attracting it to you.
If you're unhappy because you don't yet have in your possession the thing you NEED - then you are repelling it.
So, get happy NOW - not later. You have the power to control your thoughts.
In concluding this post, affirm with me that:
You will be a little less critical and a little more tolerant with other people, their faults, failings and mistakes. You will not let your own opinion colour 'facts' in a pessimistic or negative way, you will exercise your authority in Christ and speak the word of God to all those negative 'facts' which seem not to conform to the change you desire, you will practice smiling at least three times a day and regardless of what happens, you will react as calmly and as intelligently as possible.
Lets meet up next time right here, till then, be HAPPY.
I Love you and may God bless you.
Peace & Love
Libs
In the midst of all these social, ethical and personal quagmires', is it possible to really be HAPPY? what is HAPPINESS anyway?
Well...,
When it is all said and done, when everything is clean & dusted, at the end of the day, your HAPPINESS is your own, your troubles are your own, to be HAPPY or burdened - depends on you!....
Those words set the tone for what the rest of this post reveals.
Dr. John A. Schindler once defined happiness as "A state of the mind in which our thinking is pleasant most of the time".
Oh, how true...
Maxwell Maltz in His book; Psycho cybernetics, said "Happiness is native to the human mind and its physical machine. We think better, perform better, feel better, and are healthier when we are happy. Even our physical sense organs work better.
...Margaret Corbart has found that memory is greatly improved, and the mind is relaxed, when the subject is thinking pleasant thoughts. Psychosomatic medicine has proved that our stomachs, liver, heart, and all our internal organs function better when we are happy.
Thousands of years ago, wise king Solomon said in his Proverbs: 'A merry heart doeth good like medicine, but a broken spirit drieth up the bones'
....Havard psychologists studied the correlation between happiness and criminality and concluded that the old Dutch proverb, 'Happy people are never wicked,' was scientifically true. They found that a majority of criminals came from unhappy homes, had history of unhappy human relationships.
A ten year study of frustration at Yale University brought out that much of what we call immorality and hostility to others is brought about by our own unhappiness.
....A recent survey showed that by and large, optimistic cheerful business men who looked on the bright side of things were more successful than pessimistic businessmen.
....It appears that in our popular thinking about happiness we have managed to get the cart before the horse. 'Be kind and loving to other people and you will be happy.' ' I would be happy,' we say to ourselves, 'if I could be successful and healthy.'
It might be nearer the truth if we said, 'Be happy - and you will be good, more successful, healthier, feel and act more charitably towards others.' "
In reading this passage I not only see this as the best advice I can give myself, but everyone I come into contact with at church, cell group, work, socials.
So many people wonder why for example people like President Barack Obama are always so calm, cool and collected. Many wonder how he is able to speak before crowds in a non- chalant, totally relaxed way and still have everyone totally riveted.
I believe it is because he has no thoughts of resistance when he speaks. He is not concerned about offending anyone. He is not even trying to get people to like him, He is simply HIM, take it or leave it.
Very few people are this way. Most are trying to figure out how to get others to approve of them or like them. Not a good strategy because the more you NEED others to like you the less they will like you and you start developing feelings of unworthiness and self pity. Not good, not at all.
Same goes with money. The more you NEED it - the more it will stay away from you. Money and friends go where they are wanted - not where they are NEEDED. There is a world of difference between want and need. One attracts. The other repels.
Never NEED anything.
Want comes from a feeling of "I'm happy already and I'd like to have this, too." Need comes from a feeling of "I'm miserable and frustrated and I need this thing to make me HAPPY."
Most of us have been taught to set goals, to have a burning desire - be pumped up!, to be optimistic and have a positive attitude.
That is all good and should be encouraged, however, what do you do when you look at your bank statement, or your finances and you immediately begin to feel bad and agitated? What do you do when the perceived reality of your situation begins ruining your day? What do you do when you feel frustrated, fearful and worried? huh, what do you do?
Cure for Unhappiness
"We are never living, but only hoping to live; and looking forward always to being happy, it is inevitable that we never are so" said Pascal
"The attitude of unhappiness is not only painful, it is mean and ugly," says William James.
"What can be more base and unworthy than pinning, pulling, mumping mood, no matter by what outward ills it may have been engendered? what is more injurious to others? what less helpful as a way out of difficulty? It but perpetuates the trouble which occasioned it, and increases the total evil of the situation"
'Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be,' said Abraham Lincoln.
"Happiness is purely internal," says psychologist Dr. Matthew N. Chappel. "It is produced, not by objects, but by Ideas, thoughts and attitudes which can be developed by the individuals own activities, irrespective of the environment."
Stop letting things push you around! be reminded that happiness is not something that happens to you.It is something that you yourself do and determine upon.
If you wait for happiness to catch up with you or 'just happen' or to be brought to you by others or circumstances, well, you are likely to wait a long time my dear.
No one can determine or decide what you will think but yourself. If you wait for until circumstances 'justify' your thinking pleasant thoughts, you are also most likely to wait till eternity.
Everyday comes with a mixed package of good and evil. No day is at all 100% 'good'.
You will find that there are somethings and 'facts' present in the world and our personal lives at any one time, which will 'justify either a pessimistic and grumpy outlook, or an optimistic and happy outlook, it all depends on what we chose to focus on. Think, Decide & Act appropriately.
Its not a matter of being intellectually honest or dishonest. Good is as real as evil. What are you giving your primary attention to? what thoughts are you continuously holding in your mind? are you aware of them?
Remember, you are RESPONSIBLE for your own HAPPINESS , no one else is; not your government, not your company, not your wife, not your husband, not your pastor, not your children not even God! but YOURSELF!
Happiness is not something that is earned or deserved, if you are going to be happy at all, you must be happy - period! not happy "because of," Mmm hmm.., no, not that way. No "because of's."
If you're happy even though you don't yet have in your possession the thing you want - then you are attracting it to you.
If you're unhappy because you don't yet have in your possession the thing you NEED - then you are repelling it.
So, get happy NOW - not later. You have the power to control your thoughts.
In concluding this post, affirm with me that:
You will be a little less critical and a little more tolerant with other people, their faults, failings and mistakes. You will not let your own opinion colour 'facts' in a pessimistic or negative way, you will exercise your authority in Christ and speak the word of God to all those negative 'facts' which seem not to conform to the change you desire, you will practice smiling at least three times a day and regardless of what happens, you will react as calmly and as intelligently as possible.
Lets meet up next time right here, till then, be HAPPY.
I Love you and may God bless you.
Peace & Love
Libs
Tuesday, 7 July 2009
Have You ASKed?
What is it really that you desire? that which you so dearly long for? something that you hardly take a day without at least thinking about having it, what is it?, do you know it? Is it a job, is it a spouse, is it fixing your relationship, is it a house, is it finishing your studies? what is it?Take a moment and clearly identify it. please do it.
Alright..
Now that you know what it is, can i ask you one more question, Have you ever ASKED for it?
If not, why not?, if yes, why haven't you got it?......
Thank you very much for joining me today, in this post we are going to explore the ancient art of ASKING. Many lack because they ask not and many ask and receive not because they ASK amiss.
We all get by in life by Asking, it doesn't matter what your position or status in life is, Asking is part and parcel of our existence and shall always be so, we really can't get away from it.
The President to be will have to ask the electorate to vote for Him/her, the beggar in the streets will have to ask passers by for some spare change, and the rest of us in between there will once in a while have to ask for this or that.
By NOT asking, we shortchange our opportunities and thus our lives, we miss direction, we live in mediocrity and to be honest, just find life and living really tough to say the least.
Some folks are living terribly depressing lives and worse still some have gone 'mental' for apparently, problems that could have been easily resolved if they had but only ASKED for help in the first place.
ASKing is a very ancient art, yes it is an art, and even our LORD - Jesus Christ once said, ASK and it shall be given you......, for everyone who ASKeth receiveth.....
So, if even Jesus Christ reiterated the fact that we ought to ask and by asking you shall receive, why then do most people not ASK?
Broadly, speaking,whenever people don't ASK, its more or less for the following reasons.
No. 1 - FEAR,
There is a notion that we all have 'skeletons in our closets' and some folks are afraid to ASK for help for example even if they need it for fear that their skeletons will be exposed and they just can not stand to bear the shame and humiliation that follows that exposure. For these folks, they would rather live life of phoniness, deceit, delusion, moreover while silently hurting inside.
It's a shame. You see, my dear friend, this kind of attitude and lifestyle will kill you fast and quickly, its cancerous and should not be your portion.
Fear not, no one does not have challenges and we have all made mistakes in our lives, let go of the insecurity, the shame, the pride and your ego and step out, get liberated - Just ASK! step into the light and let the darkness vanish. There is no secret you can hide indefinitely, soon or later, it will be exposed. Face your fears now, rather than later.
Some of us at times have no clue whatsoever that help is available and because of the ignorance, we ask not and just keep wishing and hopping. Ignorance is such a terrible 'disease', it will keep you in the dark as for long as you accept/embrace it.
No wonder in the courts of law, they say "Ignorance is no defence".
Well then, to sort out this issue of ignorance, make up your mind to be knowledgeable about your environment, know who is who in your neighborhood, at your work place, in your social club, in your church, connect with people, network regularly, be outgoing, avoid living in your little world and embrace the big community of humanity & above all get to know yourself!
People are your greatest resource, look out for one another, do not alienate yourself or people.
Yet still, another reason why people do not ASK or shall I say don't bother to ask is that; they have asked for far too long and too often that they are just tired of asking, so they resolve to just get by, wishing and hopping that somehow things will work out. Oh no, that shouldn't be.
These folks have surrendered a very precious ingredient for living a successful life - PERSISTENCE
I am reminded at this juncture of the Stories that the LORD Jesus talked about on this very fundamental principle of persistence when he narrated the parable of the unjust Judge and the widow who persisted in Asking for Justice from the Judge till the judge finally could not stand it & gave in and helped her....Luke 18:1-6 and also the story of a friend who went and knocked at his friends' door at midnight to ask for bread....'yet because of his importunity(persistence) he will rise and give him as many as he needeth' Luke 11:8
You see, you can not just afford to give up just like that, keep asking and if you are convinced that that is the person to help you, press on, otherwise go ask another person till you get what you want, because in all honesty, some one has a solution to your problem or concern, you simply have to Ask your way to it. Ask in FAITH; 'But let him ASK in FAITH, nothing wavering. For that which wavereth is like a wave of sea driven with the wind and tosses...... A double minded man is unstable in all his ways' James 1:6-8
Now, Asking , like I pointed out earlier on, is an art, and like any other art, it is 'perfected' through practice. You have to ASK with wisdom and prudence, in Faith. You simply can't go asking anyone, you should ask the right person, like the story of the woman earlier on, she knew who to ask for help, she did not go to the doctor, or teacher, she went to the person who held the key to the solution she desired, not every listening ear is the solution, so be smart and ask the right person, if that one does not help as some will probably do, there will be yet another one, keep asking the right people till you get sorted. Do not give up.
What is important also to note, is that, in the art of asking, GIVING precedes receiving in asking.
Whenever, you ask, be prepared to give before you receive. It's really not that complicated, is it?
Lets face it: until you master the art of giving, the fact is, most of your asking will be in vain, that was true centuries ago, it's still true today and will be true tomorrow.
You have to give your time, give up your pride, give up your ego, give up your shame, give up your shyness and be bold, sometimes you will even have to spend some money before you receive that which you desire after asking.
We will all need assistance from time to time, question is, will you ASK for it? lest you be think that you can make it on your own, think again. There are no self made people. We need each other and we can only be moved to help each other when we know what is befallen us and how will others come to know and help us if we do not ASK for help in the first place?
Just ASK, if there is anything bothering you and you know somebody who can help you, go and ask for help, God has put people around us and in our lives to be ministers of His Love and Grace, reach out and take hold of His mercy- we all need it.
Alright then, we are done.
Fittingly, I shall deffer to the LORD for the last word on this subject: 'ASK and it shall be given you; seek and ye shall find; knock and it shall be opened unto you:
For everyone that ASKeth receiveth.......Matthew 7:7
I love you all, be persistent in all things and remember - There is no harm in ASKing. ASK expectantly, ASK confidently and don't be afraid to ASK.
Peace & Love
Libs
Alright..
Now that you know what it is, can i ask you one more question, Have you ever ASKED for it?
If not, why not?, if yes, why haven't you got it?......
Thank you very much for joining me today, in this post we are going to explore the ancient art of ASKING. Many lack because they ask not and many ask and receive not because they ASK amiss.
We all get by in life by Asking, it doesn't matter what your position or status in life is, Asking is part and parcel of our existence and shall always be so, we really can't get away from it.
The President to be will have to ask the electorate to vote for Him/her, the beggar in the streets will have to ask passers by for some spare change, and the rest of us in between there will once in a while have to ask for this or that.
By NOT asking, we shortchange our opportunities and thus our lives, we miss direction, we live in mediocrity and to be honest, just find life and living really tough to say the least.
Some folks are living terribly depressing lives and worse still some have gone 'mental' for apparently, problems that could have been easily resolved if they had but only ASKED for help in the first place.
ASKing is a very ancient art, yes it is an art, and even our LORD - Jesus Christ once said, ASK and it shall be given you......, for everyone who ASKeth receiveth.....
So, if even Jesus Christ reiterated the fact that we ought to ask and by asking you shall receive, why then do most people not ASK?
Broadly, speaking,whenever people don't ASK, its more or less for the following reasons.
No. 1 - FEAR,
There is a notion that we all have 'skeletons in our closets' and some folks are afraid to ASK for help for example even if they need it for fear that their skeletons will be exposed and they just can not stand to bear the shame and humiliation that follows that exposure. For these folks, they would rather live life of phoniness, deceit, delusion, moreover while silently hurting inside.
It's a shame. You see, my dear friend, this kind of attitude and lifestyle will kill you fast and quickly, its cancerous and should not be your portion.
Fear not, no one does not have challenges and we have all made mistakes in our lives, let go of the insecurity, the shame, the pride and your ego and step out, get liberated - Just ASK! step into the light and let the darkness vanish. There is no secret you can hide indefinitely, soon or later, it will be exposed. Face your fears now, rather than later.
There is absolutely no harm in ASKing!
There is yet another set of us who do not ASK because of fear of rejection.
There is nothing that holds people back like the fear of rejection!
My dear, it is never appointed anywhere in this vast universe that you will be unanimously accepted by all people, that would be a mystery,get that right into your inner man. Not even Jesus was accepted by every one till this day!
Some people will reject you no matter what you do. Be cool about it, its the way of life and nothing to be afraid of. Your life has to go on no matter the rejections which you will inevitably meet in this world, do not be put off, neither should the prospect of rejection cause you not to ASK, go a head and Ask anyway, learn your lessons and move on!
No.2- IGNORANCESome of us at times have no clue whatsoever that help is available and because of the ignorance, we ask not and just keep wishing and hopping. Ignorance is such a terrible 'disease', it will keep you in the dark as for long as you accept/embrace it.
No wonder in the courts of law, they say "Ignorance is no defence".
Well then, to sort out this issue of ignorance, make up your mind to be knowledgeable about your environment, know who is who in your neighborhood, at your work place, in your social club, in your church, connect with people, network regularly, be outgoing, avoid living in your little world and embrace the big community of humanity & above all get to know yourself!
People are your greatest resource, look out for one another, do not alienate yourself or people.
Yet still, another reason why people do not ASK or shall I say don't bother to ask is that; they have asked for far too long and too often that they are just tired of asking, so they resolve to just get by, wishing and hopping that somehow things will work out. Oh no, that shouldn't be.
These folks have surrendered a very precious ingredient for living a successful life - PERSISTENCE
I am reminded at this juncture of the Stories that the LORD Jesus talked about on this very fundamental principle of persistence when he narrated the parable of the unjust Judge and the widow who persisted in Asking for Justice from the Judge till the judge finally could not stand it & gave in and helped her....Luke 18:1-6 and also the story of a friend who went and knocked at his friends' door at midnight to ask for bread....'yet because of his importunity(persistence) he will rise and give him as many as he needeth' Luke 11:8
You see, you can not just afford to give up just like that, keep asking and if you are convinced that that is the person to help you, press on, otherwise go ask another person till you get what you want, because in all honesty, some one has a solution to your problem or concern, you simply have to Ask your way to it. Ask in FAITH; 'But let him ASK in FAITH, nothing wavering. For that which wavereth is like a wave of sea driven with the wind and tosses...... A double minded man is unstable in all his ways' James 1:6-8
Now, Asking , like I pointed out earlier on, is an art, and like any other art, it is 'perfected' through practice. You have to ASK with wisdom and prudence, in Faith. You simply can't go asking anyone, you should ask the right person, like the story of the woman earlier on, she knew who to ask for help, she did not go to the doctor, or teacher, she went to the person who held the key to the solution she desired, not every listening ear is the solution, so be smart and ask the right person, if that one does not help as some will probably do, there will be yet another one, keep asking the right people till you get sorted. Do not give up.
What is important also to note, is that, in the art of asking, GIVING precedes receiving in asking.
Whenever, you ask, be prepared to give before you receive. It's really not that complicated, is it?
Lets face it: until you master the art of giving, the fact is, most of your asking will be in vain, that was true centuries ago, it's still true today and will be true tomorrow.
You have to give your time, give up your pride, give up your ego, give up your shame, give up your shyness and be bold, sometimes you will even have to spend some money before you receive that which you desire after asking.
We will all need assistance from time to time, question is, will you ASK for it? lest you be think that you can make it on your own, think again. There are no self made people. We need each other and we can only be moved to help each other when we know what is befallen us and how will others come to know and help us if we do not ASK for help in the first place?
Just ASK, if there is anything bothering you and you know somebody who can help you, go and ask for help, God has put people around us and in our lives to be ministers of His Love and Grace, reach out and take hold of His mercy- we all need it.
Alright then, we are done.
Fittingly, I shall deffer to the LORD for the last word on this subject: 'ASK and it shall be given you; seek and ye shall find; knock and it shall be opened unto you:
For everyone that ASKeth receiveth.......Matthew 7:7
I love you all, be persistent in all things and remember - There is no harm in ASKing. ASK expectantly, ASK confidently and don't be afraid to ASK.
Peace & Love
Libs
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)